Why comparison hurts

#16 on changing the weight of comparisons, style development, and questioning reality

Hey 1,250+ friends, it’s Hannah here from Quoted Visually!

Welcome to another issue of Floating Thoughts where I share an insight, image and personal update - bringing you on the journey of my shop ✨

“Comparison is the thief of joy,” said Theodore Roosevelt 

The only comparison worth making is with who we were yesterday, says Steven Bartlett.

Yet, whether we admit it or not, many of us are busy comparing ourselves left, right and centre, and measuring how successful or accomplished we are based on the people we see online or live amongst.

Here we are, feeling both the brunt of the comparison and the guilt for doing it.

So where do we go from here?

Social comparisons are part of the fabric of our existence.

If we can’t stop comparing, then instead, maybe we can change how much weight we give to the comparisons?

From the outside, it appears that everyone else has their lives together, but in reality, we only see a selected part of their existence.

  • We see what others choose to share and when they choose to share it.

  • Whereas in ourselves, we see every single achievement and flaw in real-time.

Change their weight

The comparisons are asymmetrical and incomplete.

We are giving the people around us too much credit and ourselves not enough.

Our idols are equally human and imperfect like us.

But so are our critics.

Meaning, those that who judge us, do so based on the partial picture.

Their opinions come from outside the frame, and whilst this viewpoint can have its merits, we don’t need to take what others say as truth.

We can afford to trust our gut more and give our unhelpful comparisons less weight because are often doing better than we think.

💡 Inspiration

Chris Williamson’s podcast inspired what you have just read:

“I’ve learned to study people before I react” - David Goggins.

Goggins reminds us that those trying to tear us down are often in a worse place than we are.

A mindset shift that can help us withhold judgment and move from a place of resentment and anger to compassion and even pity.

🗞️ Update

Did you notice the visuals looked different? 👀

🔔 I have been working behind the scenes to develop my style. Let me know what you think!

*I haven’t yet released these online*

Why? The white background was unforgiving!

I was battling with this feeling of ‘is this complete’ and was starting to be less excited about my output.

But with this new notebook background, I can add value to the frame before I’ve even put an idea down, and all of a sudden the spark is back 💥

And without getting too geeky here, the visuals have edges now.

This shifts the focus to the image as a whole rather than the individual components.

It is also a nod to my roots. Little Hannah would create visual notes to study.

👉🏻 These changes to my visuals are part of my wider RETHINK!

Foggy walk with my festive & freshly groomed pooch

I am questioning everything right now and taking some time to do some inner work with the help of a coach to change the game in 2024 🔄

The truth is, I feel a little stuck, so I am working to carve out a new career path, one that will fulfil my need to see people in real life and allow me to invest time into Quoted Visually at the same time.

These are scary thoughts - a shift in where I generate my main income.

But what is more scary is staying in the same place!

This is growth! I wrote about it here 👇🏻

If you are going through a big rethink too, you may find the Quoted Visually calendar helpful for planning:

You can use the code Closefriends10 for a discount!

That’s a wrap. Thanks for being here!

Feel free to reply to this email if you have any questions, requests or feedback. I will respond at my earliest opportunity.

Big love,

Hannah aka Quoted Visually x

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